Weak in Wester Ross

First things first: The new blogspot site / post composition is utterly fucking rubbish. Very user-unfriendly, obscure menus, normal post options made inconvenient, switching between compose mode and HTML mode is broken (randomly adds loads of line breaks in some cases), compose mode with photos produces a load of bloated HTML that takes ages to edit. Just like Metoffice's truly appalling disaster of a new "site" and Facebook's ridiculously bad Turdline farce, this is another site with a redesign specifically to make things harder and annoying for users. Take note Blogspot - you normally provide a good service, but you fucked up this time. Please stop it.


Anyway this is a blog mostly about climbing (and occasionally trying to educate people with properly good dance / metal music), and I did some climbing recently. 2 days in glorious sunshine at Loch Tollaidh and Diabeg. Always a pleasure to visit those areas, even if Diabeg is a bit of a polished trade crag - which I nimbly avoided by doing some lesser-known classics. Unfortunately I also nimbly avoided any semblence of progression or challenge or getting on and putting some effort into things. I just didn't have any OOOMPH. There might be a few reasons: tired from early start and long drive, tired from rubbish nights sleep and general worries, lack of power training due to elbow, general weakness due to elbow, lack of warming up on suitably ooomphy routes. But really there was also a tedious lack of determination and ooomphing the fuck up. At the end of the day I had plenty of fun and it was a NICE weekend (the highlight being Phil's choice of an exceptionally good local game terrine for a picnic lunch), but I felt I missed out on giving more effort to the climbing and reaping the rewards.

As a slight aside, I popped out locally recently with new local Jade and fleetingly visiting old skool gnarler Duncan (who has been climbing for nearly as long as I've been alive, maybe there is hope for me yet!). Limited to local, we cruised to Craigmore and took advantage of the fresh breeze brushing through the shrouding trees. Just a couple of routes each, but it was an interesting experience on Spinal Wall - I had scrubbed the breaks on this a few years ago and never got back to lead it. However now someone has thoroughly cleaned it, in a "wirebrushing the entire sheet of rock" sort of way. Fair enough as it should get a lot more attention and is possibly the most substantial lead up to and including it's grade at the crag. I had vague recollections of lots of little cam and finger breaks....obviously too vague as they all seemed to be thin, flared, and rounded!! Thus requiring some care with the cams and some tenacity with the fingers.

In other news my elbow is still properly fucking tweaked. I am trying to maintain a good balance of climbing and resting and theraputic exercises, although annoyingly taping across the injury site seems to be mashing up the other side of my arm with the tape cutting in :S. The weekend away was okay, the cold cranking at Craigmore was much less okay. Ugggg.



Spinal Wall gurn


Spinal Wall grunt


Flake Crack

Ardnamurchan Adventure.

I was due to go to Ardnamurchan in 2009. Friends had a cottage booked but the last minute forecast showed consistent showers. I paid for my place and backed out gracefully. Seeing their photos later, it showered pretty much every day. I was also due to go at some other point with the Pylon King, but he begat the Pylon Prince and became fixated with Wye Valley esoterica (worrying even by my low standards). It's taken a long time to actually get there but I finally managed this weekend with a small Glasgow team. It also takes a long time to get there full stop: Easy to Glen Coe, fun across the Corran ferry micro-crossing, endlessly tedious on single track roads until the edge of the Scottish mainland. I'm grateful that Tom was driving. But once you get there, well...

...it's a fucking volcano!
It's pretty rad really. Climbing along the rim of a volcanic caldera, walking through the centre and seeing the crater arcing around you. All ancient and extinct of course??


Don't worry, it's only a heather fire, and it blew out fairly quickly on the second day. Funnily enough, I was in Wester Ross last April when the Torridon fires kicked off and drove through the glen as Liathach was on fire above a highly out-gunned lone fire engine, and now I was in Ardnamurchan this April for a smaller but no-doubt worrying hill fire. Coincidence?? Honestly, guv!


Day 1 was the drive-in day via an alpine start and "tolerable" coffee at the Green Welly stop, so the team decided to go for the accessible Achnaha buttress (10 o'clock on the rim). Shorter routes and a shorter walk-in, I'd wanted to go there anyway. To be honest it was pretty disappointing. The walk-in wasn't too short but the routes often were, as well as some obscure overgrading. Bondi Beach and Wheesht! were more substantial, and despite having a cold and pump-induced wobbler on the latter, I was chuffed to get it done as I'd seen a photo of the first ascent in On The Edge ages ago. Old inspiration being sated once again, which pleases me greatly.


Day 2 was the longer walk-in and longer routes of the Meall-An-thingy crags (1 o'clock on the rim), which require a stomp across most of the crater but are pleasingly adjacent once you're based there. Both the length of the walk and the routes were less than appeared, as a good track and only gentle undulations made the former fairly tolerable for me (I was trying walking poles for the first time and despite feeling like a complete dome using them, I think they do help, taking the edge of the exhaustion), and the curvacious crests of the crags made the routes taper off into easy ground fairly quickly. Not a venue for sustained mega-pitches, but vastly better than the "roadside" crag and a great gabbro experience in a lovely location.

The only downside was the peril of a less travelled venue, at least on the harder routes. I rattled off Up Pompei (above), and Mirka (which is interestingly photo-featured in SMC's Scottish Rock with the wrong route caption "Minky", not even mentioned in the text, and unspeakably bad beta in the photo, bravo), and fancied a sterner challenge so tried The Great Euchrite... This turned out to be only one full grade undergraded, but that grade makes the difference between certain groundfall from slopey 5c crux moves a fair way above an RP0 in a shallow seam even if the RP held which it wouldn't, and, well, not groundfall. I chose "not groundfall" and somewhat embarassingly had to be rescued from a small rest (rest....my feet and calves still hurt today) ledge. Somewhat letting the side down, but a useful lesson about maintaining wariness of such offpiste routes.


And that was that. Another cool venue explored. :)

Aberdeen Assault.

Many of the Aberdeen sea-cliffs, despite being sunny, open, and enjoying a much less malevolent climate than the rest of Scotland, have a ridiculously short climbing season. Thanks to the pesky and permanently incontinent seaburds, you can only climb on some of the best cliffs in late winter - nesting birds making them completely inaccessible in spring and summer, and bird's nests making them mostly unfeasible in autumn. Scottish climbing is never simple, eh!

Last winter I had a few good trips up exploring otherwise birded crags, but did miss out on a few classic venues. This winter I've focused mostly on collecting elbow injuries i.e. bouldering and training, and have suddenly realised that I have at most a week or two to get to those venues before the birds do. Thus a last minute dash to Aberdeen last weekend, to meet with my SC2 partner in silver league, "Vulture", and KathrynC.

The Round Tower. It's mostly square.
Saturday was Round Tower. Non-birdy, reasonably sheltered, but cold air. When the sun briefly appeared it was great conditions, otherwise a little chilly for steep trad. But determination and peppermint tea kept us going. I did the superbly exposed Ramadan (the arete above!), the classic guidebook covertick of Tyrant Crack, and the funky wee wall climb of Silver Surfer. Brad also led the former two, and since Tyrant Crack was a longstanding wish of his, there was much satisfaction all round, culminating in a take-out curry and chocolate naan bread which I was too full to eat but made a great snack on...

These are Silkies. There were no Silkies at Silkie's Cliff.
...Sunday. Which was Silkie's Cliff. The original plan was to go to Arthur Fowlie and Silkie's, but incoming rain reduced our options to a quick hit. We still managed 5 routes total at sheltered Silkies, albeit the last one was finished in the rain. There was a silver lining to that particular sodden cloud, as despite the lack of Silkies, we did see porpoises. I was pleased with a good wee E3 route, Kathryn was pleased with her first VS of the season, and overall it was a good weekend. I'm hoping to get back up later in the week if the weather allows, as I'm still syked for Arthur Fowlie and Berrymuir / Red Band cliff. Fingers crossed!

Glorious Gairloch.

This year, Scotland's summer is in....March. Maybe the Indian Summer will be in December then? Or perhaps early August to maximise midges? Who knows. All I know is the slightest hint of dryness sends me into a twitchy panic that I MUST get out because God knows when it will be dry again. Seems stupid to be like that but that's what experience teaches you up here.

Thank fuck, I got a plan organised, big up to JadeL who was up for going to Gairloch for a weekend. A bit of a mission for two days (although we did get back from the Stone Valley Crags parking spot to Glasgow in 3:45, only 10mph over the limit apart from a bit faster from Kinlochewe to Garve), but oh so worth it. I was smitten by Gairloch the first time I went with Pylon King, and have been back a few times. Normally I could get a bit jaded by revisiting the same areas, but no....Gairloch is just so nice. Stunning scenery, lovely rock, great cragging, the perfect blend of wildness and accessibility.

The first day at Jetty Buttress and Mungasdale I didn't do that much climbing, I was just enjoying the vibe of being back in my natural environment. It was also very still and warm which had me feeling a bit slothful, so I backed off a few tricky routes and just did some warm-up ones, still fun though.

The second day at Stone Valley was sunnier, breezier, bigger and more gooder. 35 minute approach stomp is plenty for me but I made it. We did a good variety of routes and I managed a few trickier ones this time....I'm starting warming into the trad again, this is only my 2nd and 3rd days since October. By the end of the day my fingers were burning from the immaculately rough Gneiss, my toes were burning from breaking in new shoes while seconding slabs, and my legs were aching from the walk-in.....pleasurable pains!!

My trad leading felt fine....I'm getting back into it, felt pretty competent, just need to stay focused.

My elbow felt fine....a bit tweaky at the end of each day but feeling good on the climbing, just need to be careful.

My fitness felt....well whatever, but days out like this are EXACTLY what I need....and lots of. Physical and spiritual health!!

P.S. I am working on the follow-up post about my weight n stuff....soon.

Carrock Crush.

In reality another Misanthrope Mission, but technically not as I actually invited a couple of homies down but they couldn't make it. I'm just as happy pootling around on my own, it allows me to get more focused too.

I've had a love/hate relationship with Carrock Fell. It's a great venue with plentiful inspiring problems, but I've had a couple of visits where I've seen a cool, breezy forecast, and been fully syked for the rough gabbro circuits, but it's turned out surprisingly muggy (the background of my blog title is taken from a hazy Carrock day) and I've got my arse kicked by the finger-shredding crimpy walls. I've never felt I've got to grips with the boulders, until the other day...

THIS time the conditions would have to be in my favour: Arriving at midday, it's glorious sun slowly slinking off the hillside, -1°C, and a steady South Easterly breeze. Perfect. I stomped up the hillside to the Mile High Wall. Rockfax says to avoid the bracken and "stick to the rocks" which I did. Pretty soon I skidded off icey rock and down into a jagged pit, only being stopped by being wedged between my mats and my shin on a rough boulder. Once at Mile High Wall however, the vibes were spot on. And then things pretty much proceeded as in the video above - I did some great problems although I didn't flash as many as I wanted (more on this later). I also tried a few other things (finger-shredding crimpy walls) and recced some cool problems for another time.

Just a classic bouldering day out :D.

Gibbage 1 & 2.

Gibbage because we are climbing near Gibraltar. Not on Gibraltar, it's full of monkeys and probably tourists too. According to the woman in the hostel we're staying in, we should be tourists too, day-tripping to Morocco, visiting quaint towns in the mountai......FUCK THAT SHIT WE'RE HERE TO CLIMB.

Yesterday was travelling day. Up at 5 to get an early flight to Malaga. Really that should have demanded an early night but I stayed up playing Skyrim (level 64 h2h/magic Orc, 530,000 gold, 186 dungeons cleared, I hope no-one cares about that) and then faffing around printing out info for crags near Malaga to get something done before heading to Algeciras base camp in the evening. The latter turned out to be useful as Mijas was an idea stop-off: 10 mins off the motorway, roadside cragging, sun and shade and a good variety of the usual Euro-lime bollox. 5 leads each certainly made good use of the afternoon. However the lack of sleep and food hit me like a ton of turd and I ended up feeling exhausted to the point of feverish. Add in an extra 1 hour 20 minute nightmare just trying to find the hostel, and epic faffage with parking and organisation and I was so relieved to pass out into sleep.

That sleep worked and I was ressurrected this morning feeling pretty perky. So it was on with the main mission, exploring the sandstone crags of San Bartolo, starting with the distinctly funky Sector Mosaico - a clean sheer wall of prehistoric scales that looks desperate but has several amenable lines starting at F6a+. We started on a F6a+ and it rocked, lovely juggy edgy sandstone. And thusly I continued to lead 6 routes in total, nothing hugely challenging yet (just getting warmed up ;)), via some fun dog action, a nice chorizo sandwich, a surprising power-nap, and enough sun (and maybe sunburn) to recharge the solar cells nicely. Tonight I do NOT feel like death, but the bed is still oh-so-appealing ;)

A fun dog.

An insolent oaf.

Backlog Blog!!

Previous weekends as follows:
Sorry for all the number bollox but it's been a good run and I can't be arsed to write anything more interesting.

Desires come true at Duntelchaig
Before I considered moving to Scotland, I had 3 routes I'd seen photos of that had really inspired me. I did Edgehog a few weeks ago, and then managed to get to Dracula, which really is a good steep E3 5c crack and not an HVS jamming traverse lke it looks in the photos... One more to go....soon ;). Now I have a thousand more inspirations from my being up here, though.
Dracula E3 5c ***
The All Seeing Eye Font6c ** (flash)

Awesome at Ardmair
I liked Ardmair a lot before, and I like it even more now. Apparently the home of gritty rounded rock and steep jamming sandbags....more like the home of good holds, good gear, and generous grades!
Shakedown E3 5c **
Western Skyline E4 6a **
Space Monkey E2 5c ***
Unleash The Beast E4 6a ***

Lovely day at Lochan Dubh
Originally the plan had been to go to Inverthingy Rock Gym, but since Richie had ticked the crag, we needed another option. A brisk Northerly wind precluded many of the more interesting Gairloch crags, but the sunny and scenic Lochan Dubh seemed a sensible choice. Nice to get on the gneiss, and satisfying to do some big pitches.
The Missing Link E2 5b *
Call Of The Wild E4 6a ***

Minimal respite at Moy Rock
Finally to route off a diverse weekend of schisty stuff, sandstone and gneiss, we added conglomerate into the mix, well indeed it is a mix in itself. It's always fascinated me and Inverness seems the home of UK conglomerate sport climbing. Bizarre and intriguing, who could ask for more. Well, apart from a bit more fitness and freshness after a long weekend...
Little Teaser F6b+ ***
The Dark Side F6c/+ **

Power at Portlethen
As with pretty much everywhere on the Aberdeen coast, Portlethen has shut my ass down. Time for revenge, well only a little bit - small numbers! Under the watchful eye of Mr Big Numbers - indeed the power was his this session, with a massive run of macho problems - I managed to do a couple of previous nemesii fairly steadily. So that was nice. I don't suck that much after all.
Slap And Tickle Font6b+ ** (worked)
The Prow Font6c *** (worked)

Balls conditions at Balmashanner
The lovely Lyons decided a nice sunny evening was best spent clipping bolts in a dank festering hole in the ground, and who was I to argue?? Climbing is a broad church, right?? Apart from bloody mountaineering, that's an entirely different church with it's fair share of wizened old weirdos and kiddy fiddlers. Anyway and alas, Balmashanner really was dank and festering so I warmed up on one lead and warmed down on one errr aid pitch, and that was that. Ace dinner though.
Start The Fire F6b+ **

Climbing really okay at Clashrodney
Next up for my Crushing Aberdeen weekend was a bit of a granite taster. Clashrodney is a nice place with nice climbing, most of which I avoided by sticking to steep and pokey stuff, but that was cool, it turned out to be good fun and give me some confidence. Notably the hardest route felt easy and the easier routes felt hard. Hmmm.
Yellow Peril E1 5b *
Birthday Treat E1 5b ***
Blind Faith E3 5c **

Finishing nicely at Findon Ness
Already evening but with a showery morning forecast the next day, I was determined to get a bit more out of the day, and get a bit more action on the steep and worrying metamorphic schist that spanked my arse sideways a few weeks prior. This time there was distinct progress - my plan of "lots of chalk, slam in the cams, move quick and trust to good holds" seemed to work. There was a bit of a blip going off route on the ambiguous Siva-Guru connection and sitting on the gear before realising I'd ignored a piss easy finish. I can live with that, I got way more pumped attempting the off route version and resting for 10 seconds than if I'd gone direct (a clearer description would help!) initially. Spirit of the law rather than merely the letter of the law!
Siva-guru E3 5c **
Armed Conflict E1 5b **

Mini-beasting at Munich Buttress
A recent inspiration has been the well photographed Monkey Puzzle at Longhaven Quarries. Well photographed and justifiably so as it is an ace tower of rock - strong and dramatic lines up a striking pillar. Both routes I did were brilliant, the mini-beasting came from approx 3m of crux climbing in Jammy Dodger - nope I didn't dodge the jams and yep it was the hardest bit of crack climbing I did on lead. Raaaargh.
Monkey Puzzle E3 5c **
American Route / Jammy Dodger E3 6a **

Final words from the lean and mean Aberdeen legend, regular Font 7a+ ticker, and attempted Jammy Dodger seconder Amanda Lyons:

I'LL FOOKIN' KILL YOU LITTLE MAN!!!!

:D

Antics at Arbroath, exciting rubble at Elephant Rock.

Scotland is hardly internationally, nationally or even sub-nationally renowned for it's sport climbing. Nevertheless what it lacks in outstanding quality it makes up for in variety. From sea-cliffs to mountain crags, from pastoral outcrops to urban convenience, you can clip bolts on basalt (Dumbarton, Dunglass etc), dolerite (Benny Beg), quarried dolerite (Ratho), schist (Glen Ogle, Weem, Dunkeld etc), quarried granite (North Berwick Law), sandstone (Arbroath), quarried sandstone (Ley, Legaston etc), conglomerate (Camel, Moy Rock), rhyolite (Tunnel Wall), gneiss (Gruinard River Crags) and volcanic "stuff" (Elephant Rock). Last Saturday, with North West bouldering legend Richie Betts, I got to sample two of the more distinctive sport climbing areas...

The weather was equally distinctive - distinctive as in raining despite a dry forecast, then raining out of a clear blue sky, then gloriously sunny but with all the fields furiously steaming and sending up swirls of micro-haar. Somehow the rock - despite steaming a bit on our arrival - was in fairly good condition. Which is fortunate given that Arbroath issomewhat unnerving by sport climbing standards. How can 10m bolted routes be unnerving?? Well, slopey rounded sandstone and abseil approaches into hanging belay stances just above the sea, that's how. Like many such situations, once one touches rock, feels the holds, pulls some moves and gets the vibe, it's all jolly good fun in the end, and indeed it was. 4 short but valuesome routes were rattled off on short order, including a classic wee F6c, and neither us nor our kit ended up in the drink. Hurrah.

No pole, no tick. Climbing rules might seem arbitrary, but consider the spirit of the law rather than the letter of the law and it all makes sense. This was actually the hardest move of the day. There should have been harder ones pulled off, but Elephant - which somewhat joyously really does look like an elephant - faces North-ish, and the harder routes tend to follow impressive but potentially greasy cracks. Now I love a bit of greasy crack action me, but not on overhanging F7as that look like bolted Gogarth. So we left those for another day, and rattled off another 4 mid sixes in short order. Elephant is described as "a mixed volcanic intrusion" and one can't really argue with that. Mixed and weird and interesting and fun because of all that. I will be back in dry weather that's for sure. A good and interesting day out!

Perfect days at Polldubh.

One of the main, but not only, reasons for being in Scotland is to be able to explore the awesome, diverse, and beautiful cragging with normal weekend trips rather than the 8 hour missions from Sheffield. The winter, variable weather, and even more variable climbing partners has made this a sometimes frustratingly distant dream even when the crags are considerably closer. But now, spring has sprung (it's raining outside as I type), the ski season is over, and the snow and ice is finally fucking off the crags.

So the cragging season is starting (well, continuing, for me) in earnest. In the recent heatwave, I managed a 2 day dash to Polldubh. I'd been years ago, an abortive 12 hour round trip of sunshine and showers and rain and midges and general utter bollox. THIS trip was considerably better. Two days of superb sunshine and terrific temperatures and classy cragging in stunning surroundings - I'd never made it up to see Steall Falls before....how damn cool is that area?!


[Land Ahoy on Black's Buttress - 15m of intense and immaculate 5a - 5b climbing to reach the first gear. Not the sort of "gritstone legbreaking horror" I usually choose these days, but a great experience nevertheless, very interesting keeping calm on fairly steady climbing in an increasingly serious position.]

Day one I seconded plenty of easy routes until late in the evening when we trekked up to Black's Buttress and I did two great slabs. Day two we trekked up to Wave Buttress - my main inspiration - first before it got too warm, and I did the legendary Edgehog (well worn, well chalked, join the dots trade route) and the adjacent Walter Wall (no chalk, less gear, a much more satisfying journey), and then finished off lounging and belaying in the sun - I got sunburnt! In the Highlands! In spring! This is the sort of trip that makes it all worthwhile, and hopefully there'll be many more when the weather allows. Basically, even more RAD, even more SYKED :D

Going well at Great Wanney, climbing languidly at Crag Lough

So after Sicily it was onto Northumberland for Secret Squirrel's Secret Weekend - with only a minor diversion driving to fucking Glasgow to get spare climbing kit and warfarin. Thanks Ryanair you cunts, I really appreciated the extra 4 hours driving and a total of 3 hours sleep. Genuine thanks to Red Bull and to the climbing posse for being leisurely enough that I met them at the crag parking. That crag was Great Wanney (Squirrel wisely chose to base us in Bellingham to explore the equally interesting but underused southern Northumbria area), and that name filled me with a certain amount of trepidation, because I've been wanting to do the minor classic Thin Ice (below) for years and that doing probably meant getting scared and faffing and stuff.


In the end, however, it didn't mean that at all!! After warming up on the opposite route (Broken Wing - almost as good and an essential warm-up), the World Famous Helen Rogers - as well as providing the usual excellent company AND plenty of amusement getting to grips with Wanney's easy classics - was kind enough to abseil down and clean Thin Ice (north facing crag, bit of lichen, likely first ascent of the year etc etc). And so I got on it and skated up it with a quite frankly shocking lack of fuss. This might be because it's a full grade overgraded, or it might be because it was really inspiring and just drew me on - the crux (below) being the best sequence in Northumbria, surely? Or it might be because I'm climbing well....but let's not get too silly...


Next day, after actually participating in another leisurely morning of eating bacon and stroking cows (mmm cows), the remaining members of the party sampled the diversity of the area by visiting the vaguely Tremadog-esque Crag Lough and Peel Crag. My highest aspirations at this crag were also lichenous and there was no Helen Rogers to get her brush into action, so I could relax and sample some other options. Except, in the perculiar world of grades, styles, and climbing variance, both the other options I did felt as hard as anything the previous day. Good onsight challenges, and one was a great route. And that was that. Feel very chuffed, drive back to Glasgow, battered haggis and chips and SLEEP.

Nice thrutching at North Third

One of my vague Scottish sub-plans is to climb at least a route at every crag with starred Extremes in the Lowland Outcrops book (apart from some of the Galloway Hills nonsense with 3 day walk-ins). Not necessarily for top quality climbing but for the interest and diversity and love of esoteric wee crags. The other weekend I had an unexpected chance to do just that, and got both an esoteric wee crag and top quality climbing.


This is North Third, where we hadn't planned to go to. We had planned to go to Cambusbarron Quarry, which was looking increasingly implausible as I drove through heavy showers to get there. A sopping wet carpark dissuaded us from even wasting the 2 minute walk-in. After some musing on plan B (drive down to Ratho, climb outside if dry or inside if wet), Mike from Dundee decided it was too much extra driving, but said he was going to have a recce of North Third. I was curious so drove along too, "just for a look". Curiosity rewarded the cat and the crag, being considerably more open and exposed, was actually dry.


Thus (after an abortive and somewhat "steep learning curve" jamming lesson attempt by Mike) I managed to get to grips the jamming classic Jezebel, which was great, and then Flying Dragon opposite (and above) which was even greater. Jamming at it's best, at a crag with a great location and really unusual vibe, like few places I've climbed at in the UK. So I got unexpected dry rock, an unplanned esoterica tick, and undeniably good climbing. Win!

Really quite good fun at Ratho Quarry.

As good as the indoor climbing is at the Ratho mega-wall, it's important not to forget that it's actually built within a proper traditional crag and thus there is proper traditional climbing on the outdoor walls outside the indoor walls. Although, hmmm, the Ratho lead walls are pretty amazing....so long....so pumpy... Ah fuck it what am I say, of course the quarry is miles better!! Yay for Easy Trad (tm) in Grotty Quarries!!

So, another afternoon, another couple of decent trad leads, in fact two that I'd been wanting to do since I recced it years ago, when Ratho wall was just a twinkle in the receivers' eyes... Shear Fear, the apparently fearsome flake crack that actually turned out to be full of big holds, good gear, and good rests on jugs and jams. Not the battle I expected and nice interesting climbing. And Gruel Brittania, an odd semi-fridge-hugging combination of an arete and thin crack, which turned out to be the hardest trad lead I've done since before my DVTs. Hard technical crux low down, harder psychological crux high up, and great climbing using all the available features.

Two routes, both classics, both photo-ticks in the old guide. Both apparently stern challenges, one wasn't and went smoothly, one was and made me try hard, both good experiences, both good training for the greater ranges of Gairloch etc :).

Meribelly!

When I arrived back in Glasgow prior to the Official Lads Bouldering Weekend, I had arrived back from Geneva and thus Brides Le Bain and thus Meribel and Les Trois Vallees, where I had of course been skiing with Madamoiselle Rogers.

It was an awesome trip. Great weather, good company, I skied loads and slept equally loads (I love the simplicity of this), we covered a vast amount of the Les Trois Vallees (including one day when I skied from Meribel to the far side of Courchevel and then back to the far side of Val Thorens). The only downside was the snow was quite icy which limited the offpiste options (too crusty) and made for some hard landings, but I'd take hard snow and good visibility over good powder and a whiteout.

HOWEVER as good as all that was, the highlight for me was how well I did with my legs. They might be fucked for walking uphill and running but evidently they are fine for skiing, despite how thigh-intensive that usually feels. I skied as well as I ever have - hard and fast (for me) all day every day, did all the blacks in Les Trois Vallees easily (although they are all well soft-touch apart from Le rather cool Grand Couloir), and had no more thigh pump than usual. Walking a few mins to the lift in the morning was tiring, but skiing all day was fine. \m/ yay \m/

There was another highlight too, the roaring success of my attempt to liven up my boring but very cheap and very functional Decathlon ski jacket with a pimp orange camo headwear combination (which was supposed to match the jacket but I'd forgotten it was more red than orange)...


...and yeah I know I need slicker goggles, I'll get some for next year. I had to order the beanie via express delivery from the University Of Minnesota, the only place I found doing a proper orange camo one, and I'm sure you'll agree it was worth the effort. Or maybe not.

10

10 - Ten - Tenerife...

Awesome climbing trip out there. Good to glorious weather, good climbing partner, good, varied and distinctive climbing (my inspiration about it being different to the Euro-lime norm being proved right), lots of great routes (42 in total), F6c+ being the highlight quality grade of the trip (including several F6cs and F7as that were actually F6c+), climbing at 2100m in a vast crater of lava fields beneath the dominating volcano El Teide with a fierce sun and icy crisp air was an amazing day, every breath up there was a delight. Drove straight from the airport to a crag on the first evening and got up early on the last day to squeeze a few great routes in before our flights back. ACE.

Here's a photo diary:

Giddy at Gruinard, And at Ardmair.

Giddy with delight - the mission worked!

Actually I can't be bothered to do a write-up, so here are some pictures:

Saturday morning at Sail Mhor hostel. £13 a night, warm, comfy beds, good kitchen. Definitely the key to good climbing in winter.

The errr lovely Lyons at the gorgeous Gruinard bay. A minor crag but such a nice spot, this bit also wins "crag base of the year award 2009".

What Scottish winter climbing is all about!

Moody posy bollox.

Gairloch church. Drove over for a nice meal at the Old Inn. The hostel was surprisingly busy with a large hunting party who were culling deer, so I had wild venison steak at the pub in their honour.

No sun but still warm enough at Ardmair. This is Sculptress, on one the nicest HVSes in the history of mankind, go do it!

But bloody freezing (well -2'C to -5'C) around Inverness!

Finest pleasure in life...

...abusing and mocking those people who can't jam, when they struggle on easy crack climbs :).

Uplifting update!

I have a friend who is a good, strong, dedicated grit boulderer with a particular penchant for hidden gems and new lines. In his honour and occasionally in his company, I sometimes scout out for new projects and problems in the Peak district, and surprisingly, despite the popularity of the area and the predatory teams that lurk around with similar intent, most of the time I (or we) find something fresh and worthwhile. Most of these are too hard for me, but not always.


On one such scouting mission in the rainy summer we found this neat little wall at Chasecliffe crag near Cromford. The lack of any chalk in the overhung slots indicated it's virginity, ripe for the taking. It was left for one side until....well....today. I'd planned to go out with the chirpy Shauna, but early clag and general mizzle promised very little. A hunch that the Cratcliffe area might be drier than the main peak was soon de-hunched as it was just as dank there, as it was at Chasecliffe itself.


However! The wall itself was just dry enough, and some judicious heavy chalking (soon to be washed off with tonight's forecast) made it climbable. A brisk bit of warming up and on with the action... The lines turned out to be much easier than they'd looked before - reassuring for me and my elbow - and a few attempts saw the problems below dispatched. Only an obvious eliminate remained, but proper drizzle encouraged a tactical retreat to Wirksworth's excellent Le Mistral cafe/bar (good croque monsieur and fine cappucino - strong enough and plenty of froth). Not bad for a pissy day!


^^^ above photos are on Mistral V3 6a, up the centre of the wall. The left arete is Geek Passion V2 5c/6a ( Video here ), an eliminate line just right of Mistral will go at V4/5, and the right arete is a steady V1 5b (no bridging), traverse V2 5c-ish. All from obvious sitters off jugs.
Directions: Approach Chasecliffe from the parking at the first bend on Chadwick Nick Lane, the wall is just above the Chasecliffe boulder.

Staffordshire Obscurist!

This actually happened a while ago but I didn't get round to ranting about it here.

Ticklists: Generally bollox. Arbitrary, over-popular, so-called "essential" classics and all that nonsense. Fuck Classic Rock, Hard Rock, and Extreme Rock. Essential my arse. I can't think of anything less essential than ticking a route just because it's on a list in a book.

So, anyway, the other week, I went out ticking routes just because they're on a list in a book :D.

This list however, is different. It is a list of character and quality, of distinctiveness and purpose. It is the Staffordshire Obscurist ticklist. As mentioned before, Staffordshire grit's fine blend of the utterly classic and utterly obscure is a significant highlight of the area, and this ticklist celebrates the significant highlights of the obscure areas, with 12 fine and diverse routes from "just left of centre" to "totally off the radar". You can tell it might appeal to me ;).

Anyway, the other week, I managed to tick the list. The last two routes were fairly impressive: Atlas @ Ina's Rock, a striking and brutal crackline including a meaty roof - it took some determination and the grazes to my left armpit are finally scarring over; and Kneewrecker Chimney @ Belmont Hall, the clue is in the name, a bestial cleft that I thrashed up with a head-torch in the pitch dark. A speciality Belgian beer at the Den Engel in Leek was rarely more deserved.

So: I *am* a Staffordshire Obscurist. And I'm rather chuffed in an esoteric and arbitrary sort of way, not least because I don't know many other people, none by name anyway, who are. I think I need some decorative medal to wear when I'm in the area ;).

The list, for those who are interested:

Rubberneck HVS 5a The Clouds
- shouldn't really be on the list as although it's great it is far too mainstream.

Hangingstone Crack HVS 5b Hangingstone
- done ages ago, can't remember much about it but it had both delicacy and burl and good rock.

Kaleidoscope E1 5a Sharpcliffe
- hard for the grade but a good route and an intriguing "must try" bit of rock, classic esoterica. Get kicked off the crag for the full tick.

Kneewrecker Chimney HVS 4c Belmont Hall
- a classic of the genre, bloody hell it is too. The clue, amazingly, is in the name. Done last night via headtorch.

The Helix HVS 5a Harston
- only seconded this but a fine adventure.

Atlas E2 5c Ina's Rock
- well hopefully some day the scars to my hands, arms, and left armpit will heal, but today is not that day. A fine battle at a great crag.

Hot Tin Roof E1 5a Bosley Cloud
- brilliant route, delightful climbing, a hidden gem.

Top Brick E2 5c Dimming's Dale
- similarly, just a great route. A fun wall climbing voyage with pleasingly good gear. One of the Churnet's very best.

The Yawn V0- 5a Gradbach Hill
- good juggy highballing.

Baldstone's Arete HVS 4c Baldstones
- should have been one of the "not very esoteric but gets you started routes". A nice, varied, fun route.

Don't Go Down To The Woods Today VS 4b Skyline
- as above. As esoteric as The Roaches gets, you don't know you're on the right route until you're literally on the route. Easy but pleasant.

Kipling Arete E2 5c Rudyard Pinnacle
- great route on brilliant rock when clean and dry. As good as this is the E1 5a left arete is even better, more balanced and lovely ripples.

Go to it!

Craig Y Mwn...

Early Saturday morning: You are driving up the Rhaeadr valley in Y Berwynion. It is a lovely, fresh autumn morning, sun drenches the gentle rolling hills which gradually steepen as you head further up the valley. Minor rocks and scree start to outcrop, and then in the distance...
...you get closer...
...and see this on the hillside...
...do you think:

1) Fuck yeah, I've gotta climb on that?
2) Fuck yeah, I've gotta climb on that?
3) Fuck yeah, I've gotta climb on that?

Well, I did ;).

Craig Y Mwn is one of the many inspiringly essential crags in the Meirionydd guide. That's essential as in personally essential "wow that sounds/looks so cool I gotta go there" not the mundane socially essential "I must tick this because it's so classic / popular / rite of passage / in a book etc etc". Like last week's Meri visit, I approached it with a certain amount of trepidation: steep climbing, a steep approach, a seemingly shady north-east aspect and an expected lack of traffic lead to many qualms during the cool early morning.

Naturally all of those qualms vanished when I saw that dramatic face, it's beacon-shine an irresistable lure in the morning sun. Those qualms further mellowed when we parked up at a chilled cafe/retreat beneath Pistyll Rhaeadr, the largest waterfall in Wales. Also home to Mr Biggles, the largest dog in Wales:
10+ stone of half-St.Bernard half-ox fluffiness. His stoicism in the serious business of chilling out inspired us to similar stoicism in the short but heinous 50° slog up to the crag. Suitable established I rattled off 3 of the easier classics in fairly swift order, helped by a generous partner - thanks Squirrel. This left us plenty of time to stroll round to the waterfall (it is spectacular) and head up to Snowdonia, via some excitingly lonely moorland driving, at a timely hour.

Aside from the climbing quality, the beauty of the surroundings, and the glorious weather, this crag again was notable for the feeling of....rareness to be climbing on it. Great climbing that few other people do. According to the cafe owner: "Oh, it probably gets two or three visits a year, aye". I like that.

Sunday we started the day with showers, drizzle, and low cloud....Sunday we finished the day with bone dry, crisp sport climbing in the glowing evening sun and fresh breeze! An inauspicious early start was nimbly outwitted by visiting the rather nice Cafe Seren in Bethesda. Well-fuelled with a black pudding roll and a cappucino (with extra froth), we headed to the newly developed and scarcely publicised Penmaen Head to get a mileage day in. If you've ever wondered what this is...
...then this is it. 56 routes mostly from F5+ to F6b+ promised plenty of choice even for those with chronic injuries, and indeed delivered. In the vein of Castle Inn Quarry, an easy access McClimbing crag that manages to combine urban convenience with surprisingly pleasant climbing - the flowstone and concreted rock being particularly nice. Plenty of other teams popping in and out, and the background hum of the A55 provided a good contrast with the previous day - it's a broad church.

So... Another good weekend following inspirations. More great climbs and more great climbing. September might have started dismally but it has finished most pleasantly and reassuringly.

YYFY? Y!

Finally!!

Finally, after this dismal summer of chronic injury and chronically rubbish weather, I have done some good climbing. Finally I have gone on a good weekend to somewhere interesting and exciting. Finally I have got the pure pleasure and fun that comes from following one's personal inspiration.

Within Wales, the Meirionnydd area is a particularly fascinating area, consisting of a bewilderingly epic and varied collection of separate mountain ranges and climbing areas, promising both high quality climbing and a large amount of exploration, adventure, and uncertainty.

Within Meirionnydd, the Rhinogau is a particularly fascinating mountain area, consisting of a substantial and broad area of upland, scattered with vast numbers of crags and craglets and little trace of civilisation, promising hidden gems aplenty and a healthy dose of mystery.

Within the Rhinogau, one route out of many is particularly fascinating, one of the unsung and rarely repeated classics that was so highly regarded it was worth not one but two guidebook photographs showing it's seductive allure. That route is Rock Steady and it seemed to promise an exceptional slab climb - I'm sure any mid-grade leader seeing the photos would add it to their "must do" list. I know I certainly did and was inspired by it for the last couple of years.



(Rubbish photos of guidebook ;))

Finally I have done it! Nothing special nor outstanding in challenge nor progression, but definitely special in both the quality of the climb and the day out (which included a couple of lovely warm-up routes, good company, fine weather, and a good appreciation of the tranquility and peace of the area), and in the relief and reassurance of at last climbing something that genuinely inspires me, after many months of mediocre "treading water". This is what climbing is all about for me - inspiration, exploration, quality - and I'm happy with it.

And my elbow?? It had the usual tenderness afterwards, but the next morning (without any icing nor painkillers), felt the best it had for a couple of weeks. Go figure.

YYFY ;)