T = 0
I'm sat on a slope of tumbling tussocks, 20m above the sea, 70m below the crag top, looking out at a rising trench of steep silt with little sign of protection nor security, and I'm terrified. Unusually, rarely, I don't want to be here. A non-trivial percentage of my brain wants to scramble out and haul up the ab rope. My confidence has been very vague this summer, I'm fed up of being stressed and scared - not of the climbing, but of my own mental fragility. But....maybe I could just pull on the first holds, see if I can move...
T +1.2hrs
I'm sat on a small pedestal at the top of the silt trench, anchored in to abstract ironmongery hammered into dust, and I feel sick with fear. Well, partly fear and partly my guts playing up after wolfing down an emergency egg breakfast. The fragility is still there - if I struggled to cope with the easy intro pitch, how can I cope with the main pitches?? Maybe it's best to finish up an easier version, maybe I could cope with that. Except I'd have to do it all again at some point in the future. But....the next "poor rock" section looks easier, and I can see some resting spots to aim for...
T +1.4hrs
I've just pulled onto a thin wall, out of the steep looseness, and onto terrain that intimidates me just as much - sheer and smooth and supposedly sustained. But....I'm hanging on okay, I'm trusting small finger flakes, small foot edges, a good small nut next to me....I'm no longer scared....I'm curious, I'm inspired, I'm becoming happy....
( T +2.5hrs - the above photo )
T +4hrs
I'm sat on a dusty crag top, belaying, diligently taking the the ropes at constantly contrasting paces to best protect my partner on the bewilderingly weaving top pitch. I'm mostly.....surprised. Surprised I could cope with the initial reluctance, especially surprised I could transmogrify from that fear and nervousness to genuine pleasure in the middle pitch. Pagan isn't the hardest route I've done (nor the hardest this year, nor the hardest on South Stack), but it is one of the hardest that I've ever climbed when I've been so lacking in confidence - confidence being one of the essential pre-requisites (along with a light touch, trad nouse, and a lot of cams, rather than physical prowess) for this sort of terrain. I'm still not quite sure how it happened...
Expansive.
The mildly horrifying ""E3 5b"" first pitch. 50% of the climbing on this pitch you could have a nasty accident on.
The completely fine and normal first belay. "Yes we could sling together the 3 pegs in siltstone and abseil off into the sea to escape".
~~{§}~~
Meanwhile, a few weeks earlier....
As chance would have it, I started the Red Wall campaign nicely early this year, scarcely a few days after the bird ban was off. Gogarth South became my constant literary companion...
I've always particularly loved the second paragraph :)
LHRW was a stern reacquaintance with the terrain, but pretty good. But not as good as Television Route which was bloody marvellous, surely one of the best single pitches in the whole UK. The tricky climbing on this 45m route starts at about the 3m mark and eventually eases off at the 43m mark, and on the way takes in a massive variety of steep, committing, wobbly, technical and constantly interesting climbing. World class.
Incidentally the description is quite inaccurate so have a proper one:
Television Route E4 5c *** 45m
Start by the two loose spikes. Just to the right is a groove, follow it, passing a few rusty relics from the original aided ascent. Surmount a loose bulge to gain a better crack and step right to an improvement in rock quality and more bolt heads. Continue on easier ground with little gear to an overhung red niche in the groove, and make crux moves around the right edge of the overhang via a "thank god" jug. Move up to the where the groove steepens again, and step right to a rib and spike holds, then trend left and finish up the continuation groove, past the last remnants of scrap metal.
However there weren't enough sandy troughs on TR, so I had to go back and do Last Of The Summer Wine, a lesser-rated but quite quintessential Red Wall experience, as seen below:
"Moon cheese" according to Andy McBiscuit. Mars cheese according to me!!
The usual view of the usual situation.
Recovering after the "very exciting" start to pitch 3 - right limbs on overhanging flanges of quartz, left limbs on fins of silt. All quite emotional. Above this it was a typically brilliant finish up steady steepness - the final straits of these routes are invariably euphoric.
~~{§}~~
So, if everyone can forgive a bit of numerical masturbation, and very much taking into account the start of this post where I fully explicated my weakness, that makes it 5 out of 5 successes on Red Wall E4s (the others being Cannibal and Rapture Of The Deep), and 9 out of 9 successes overall on South Stack (adding in Hysteresis on Mousetrap, Dogs Of War and 93,000,000 Miles on Yellow Wall, and Natalie in Natalie Zawn). I will aim to do Kalahari Highway to get to a nice round number and have something on Castle Helen, but of course the post-bird-ban stuff has been a priority recently. What that all means I don't really know (especially since one generally steps onto these crags with enough in hand that failure is unlikely, or were it to happen one is unlikely to be around to blog about it afterwards!), but given my passion for the area it's something worth celebrating??
Thanks to Jodie and Jordan for accompanying me on these shenanigans.
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