Tuesday 20 November 2018

Gritstone


Luck-based scrittle they say. I think that does gritstone climbing a great disservice. It's luck AND lank AND conditions -based scrittle, in which success is entirely dependent on those factors, irrespective of skill and strength.

I lived in Sheffield for years, partly learnt to climb on grit, did well over a thousand routes and hundreds of boulder problems (including some of my hardest of both), and always struggled. Being distinctly short and sweaty and scared isn't the ideal starting point for sliding off rounded breaks while desperately fiddling in cams and then having to commit to some out of control stretch to some distant slopers etc etc *shudder*. Actually when it works it's great but it is still bloody hard. 

Moving away from it, of course I miss the massive amounts of choice and the winter suitability that is so absent in Scotland. So I head back down, despite the 15 minutes drive from a cosy home turning into 4 hours drive and finding somewhere to sleep. Actually I've already been down 4 weekends in a row which is a new record since my northerly exile. What's made the difference this time?? Two things: Willingness to go bouldering which has alleviated the scrabbling around getting partners for two days, and Airbnb which has alleviated the tedious shite of scrabbling around for accommodation (a frustration which friends and partners on the grit doorstop rarely seem to appreciate). Hence a productive start to the winter so far.

So back to the scrittle. Since moving away I think I have improved my LUCK. Tactics and wisdom and cunning stack the odds more in my favour, and a falling-practise-derived willingness to press on past gear means I can gamble on those odds more. I'm climbing better overall, so sometimes I'm climbing better on gritstone....

However, it's luck AND lank AND conditions and while I'm a better climber, I'm heavier, relatively weaker, certainly no taller, and my skin is scarcely drier. And sometimes I forget all of that is the essence of grit and sometimes grind to a greasy, stumpy halt. Sobeit, I can grudgingly accept that it's like that and some grit simply won't suit me, plus I've got 3 tubes of anti-hydral on the go. In the meantime I have done some really fun stuff, a nice mixture of esoteric micro-routing and general boulderising, like below. I even tried some highballs as highballs instead of solos but the hold was quite slopey and I kept sliding a bit off it and it was a long move to the top etc etc....I could get into this shit tho ;)

Panorama, at Panorama Crag. I'd recced this for soloing the other year, it turns out to have a wonky landing and decent gear so well worth a lead. Very minor but nice, there's a route that traverses diagonally from right to left that's the best value on this face. Typical hidden gems that are nicely documented in the essential YMC Yorkshire Gritstone guides.

Perky at Brimham. My family once had cats called Pinks and Perks. Perks was a proper lady, very dignified and very scratchy and bitey. This problem bites a bit on minging slopers and a huge stretch for the top, very cool though. Lovely bit of Brimham too, unfortunately too grey for a sunset.

Radium Arete at Woodhouse. Replicating the guidebook photo for fun. Full disclaimer: I didn't manage to do this problem. It gets Font 6A. I did Ilkley Bar Kid 6B+ in 3 goes, Perky 6B+ in 6 goes, a 6B above Radium in 2 goes, and couldn't get near to this. HUH.

Green Wall at Woodhouse. This is an HVS 5b solo, which usually on gritstone means crux groundfall onto a rocky landing from 4-5m and clearly objectively much harder than an E2 5b slab falling 8m into space past good gear. Unusually Green Wall has a 5b crux at 2m and a 4b/c ramble to finish, hence bang on. Wonders will never cease.



The Great Santini at Dovestones. You know, the one you drive past on the A59 and never stop at and really should. I've been wanting to do this route ever since opening the section in the book, and had been twice to recce it (both times trying to do Coin For A Beggar as a solo and neither time being able to compress the missing 6 inches between me and the holds into feasibility). It had always intimidated me though - tales of quality rock and good gear stank of rats and sandbags, there must be some catch. Well it turns out there's a small catch on this move, having to use a crappy micro-intermediate and blind slap to get the crux hold, but it was still fine and a really lovely route.

Bonington's Made It at Cat Crags. What a shit and un-feline name for a really cool little route. Very short and very worth leading with decent gear below a pristine but sloping top. We put the cat amongst the doves and visited both crags on a fun day.


Some 6A I can't be bothered to find at Scout Hut. The warm-up problem that took us both half a dozen goes to work out the funky beta. Actually really fun with a proper knack.


Loogabarooga at Scout Hut. Another route I'd recced previously, another micro-route well worth leading with tricky moves and good gear all the way, another hidden gem brought sparkling into view via the YMC guides. Again really fun.

Next on the list: Eavestone, Brimham outliers, Heppy natural crags, and more...

Monday 5 November 2018

Anniversary horribilus


It's now a year since I fell off a route, bashed my leg, contracted norovirus from A&E, and in the process of my body healing my leg as a priority, suffered chronic damage to my digestive system. One very small, very stupid mistake, not washing my hands properly after going for a piss in the A & E toilet, then munching on a bag of nuts because I was ravenous and thinking too much about my leg and not enough about hand hygiene. It still riles me to this day just how fucking small and fucking stupid that incident was. Deep breath Fiend...

And.... I still have PTSD about having the norovirus itself. Beyond horrendous. I wish the sedative they gave me for the endoscopy could have wiped out memories of that night too, although the trauma is partly due to the lasting effects.

Anyway...

I am not better, I am not fixed nor cured nor well. I am still ill a year on. But I have improved, a bit. I'd estimate I've got 50% better  compared to where I was. Say I was at 33% in the early stages, I'm maybe at 66% now. This is purely digestively, not DVTs nor mental health. Some progress, yes. But it's not that simple. A lot of that improvement is due to currently being on a heavily restricted diet and regular supplements. These were supposed to help me heal, maybe they have a bit, but mostly they have just kept the illness and symptoms at bay. I would say, without those restrictions, I've maybe healed to 45% - less than half normal. That's what I'd be like if I ate a normal diet. I.e., pretty shit still.

An equally, if not more, notable improvement is my mental ability to cope with it. Sporadic nausea bouts still have a direct and dramatic effect on my mood (one a few weeks back had me in tears a day later), the diet still has me frustrated, the semi-regular bloating and queasiness still distracts me. But - thanks mostly to DRUGS but also to some of my own hard work fighting through it - I'm not as depressed about it as before, and I can get on with being myself, most of the time. A bit like the permanent DVTs, as frustrating as they can be, I can usually accept being hampered and work around them (although this illness is far more mentally taxing than the minorly life-threatening DVTs *rolls eyes*).

So my goal for the year was to be able to eat pizza (yes, something I used to do very occasionally, as a treat, as a part of a balanced diet and active lifestyle, so fuck you). I don't really feel like that, partly being used to a shitty diet and partly just wanting to stack the odds for healing. That isn't going to happen. Which makes it an aim for next year.

More importantly for next year I aim to keep healing, climbing the fucking HELL out of the year (that I only managed for a couple of months this year), and be healed within two years. Blimey. That sounds fucking weird. I guess the fact I can write it with a minimum of teeth-grinding fury says something.... Pass the 20mg citalopram nurse.