Tuesday 30 October 2018

More details.


My climbing has improved. My blogging clearly hasn't. This one is a bit of a cheat. But might not be too horrible for people who like reading about climbs. So going back to the previous list in great detail...

Rotpunkt:

Silk Teddies F7c ***, Dunkeld
With the new cheating diversion into a hands-off rest next to Squirm Direct. Whatever. Don't care. I don't want a fucking authentic Cave Crag uber-geek "use this hold for one hand but don't you dare match it and rock rightwards off it" tick. I want a good challenge and this was definitely that (at least a grade harder than the only other 7c I've done (Another Choadside Attraction at the Tor, which took me a couple of brief sessions, mostly because it's classic British sport climbing i.e. run out with weird fixed gear, than it actually being hard, also noticably harder than other 7cs I tried in the Peaks, and a solid grade harder than Scottish 7b+s I did in a quick session each). Suffice to say it took me a few solid sessions and was pretty rewarding to go from struggling on all the moves to, well, not struggling quite that much! After the redpoint, I drove back down the track, got distracted by a rattle in the back of my car, slid off the road into a tiny steep ditch and got grounded out and had to get an emergency tow truck to drag me out. What a knobber!!

Vibes Right Hand F7c ***, Dunkeld

Burl with added burl on top! Maybe slightly harder than ST who knows, felt similar to me but probably suits me less, power-to-weight and all that. Not much to say about this one except each session burnt me out so it was all good training, and it was nice when the fearsome Lyons brought part of her pack o' hounds to the crag....



Scales Of Injustice F7b+/c **, Cambusbarron 


Tentatively technical teetering!! Now this was something a bit different. I - in atypical and quite shameful grade chasing mode - pondered on doing a third 7c this summer as a big FUCK YOU to my digestive illness. Omerta was spoilt by the completely unbalanced bloc start (would be a great move at ground level but fuck having to have a rope and belayer to work it out), Sultan was spoilt by being a miserable scrittle-crimp fest (not even regular anti-hydral can combat that), and Marlene was too similar to Silk Teddies - I wanted some variety. I think this might fit the bill, it was certainly an equal challenge, taking as many sessions, despite suiting me better, having better conditions, and not trashing me as much. It's not so much hard as very precarious and fall-offable. It's also quite addictive as it's really pretty cool, although I can imagine it would frustrate some people.

It's also grossly underrated, something I've tried to change. I first tried it 4 years ago and pulled a loose hold off the top onto Stevie's head, and never went back. This time it was more appealing, but I still put some effort into tree and branch clearance, cleaning a bit more wobble off the top, adding a second lower-off krab, building a wee patio, and generally encouraging other people to get on it. Not bad for a "whinging trad fanny" (more on that in a bit). And then I eventually did it and like all of my harder redpoints it was a skin-of-the-teeth slap with the final crux, which means despite working and optimising them, these routes are still fucking hard for me.

Interestingly for a route that's had 6 UKC efforts listed in 20 years, it was a day of actually queuing for the route when I did it. Grumpy Gordon was there, who I vaguely know by name, with Brian who was considerably more affable. Amazingly GG actually did it in the end which is a minor miracle given how shoddy his beta looked and how much of a miserable time he seemed to be having shouting his way off it - I ended up going out to near the 95 and soaking up some warmth and more positive vibes from the sun. BUT! Lo! The plot thickens, it turns out that I am the only person in the Central Belt who didn't know that Grumpy Gordon is actually the phenomenally stupid and grossly mis-guided arch-fuckwit "gurumed" off UKC. Thank fuck I didn't know that at the time as knowing the.....mentality behind the grump and trying to concentrate on a positive climbing experience would have been tortuous. Suffice to say that during the Ratho retro-bolt farce, he managed to incite this response from me, and I don't believe that there is ever a full distinction between online expression and offline personality.

After that I went into the closed quarry and belayed Smally on something which was nice, but not as nice as this stump:


Ledge Shuffling:

Gotterdamerung E4 5c *, Dunkeld
Dunkeld sport scenes turned into Dunkeld trad scenes for me, and yes after you've been working Silk Teddies, 5c yarding on jugs does seem physically very easy. On the other hand, relying on one RP during a huge, and steep run-out before the apparent rest jugs turn into all sorts of weird out-pointing angles does seem mentally very spooky. I really thought I could be in deep shit for several long seconds before fiddling on clusters of shit. I had a vague inkling I'd done something wrong so abseiled down the line and confirmed that a vague cam slot I'd dismissed in my urge to keep jug-pulling was quite reasonable and quite crucial. It felt like I'd "got away with it" and although I was happy with the climb, I was less happy with my climbing!!

Spanked Roof Monkey E4 6a **, Johnsheugh 
This day was a proper indication my mindstate was improving, a day trip to Aberdeen, followed by dropping Purkle off in Glasgow and continuing to visit family in Dumfries - despite feeling pretty sick in the evening. This was the sort of rewarding, exciting, energetic day I couldn't have face doing a few months before. OTOH SRM was the sort of route - if I'd been teleported to it - I could have still climbed a few months before, but then again all the schist redpointing made it feel even more piss, and a good grade easier than: 

Who Dares Wings It E4 5c ***, Johnsheugh

Now this was getting into more my sort of terrain. Positive but spooky face climbing with a lot of up-and-downing to commit to it. It turns out the description in the online guide is a pile of wank (rectangular slot? no, small finger pocket. Gear down and left? No, impossible to place on lead. Etc), so I ended up having to do another heart-in-mouth run out but this time it was necessary after careful consideration, rather than due to incompetence. It turns out there's two different variants: Direct to a faint groove with hard moves but with gear you can actually place (steady E4 6a) or right up the wall then back left to the groove, as per the mis-guide, with gear you can't place (hard E4 5c). Either is good though, and this felt a proper experience to me.

Laughing Gnome E4 5c **, Dunkeld 
Trad silliness! 20 minutes going back and forth from a rest ledge, 20 seconds actually doing a few steady but very committing moves, spacewalking above the pro. After I did it, I remembered I'd looked across from Gnome itself to see useful holds around the LG crux, and then completely forgotten about them by the time I got round to doing it. Good tactics! 

Sidewinder E4 6a **, Glen Lednock 
Now this was getting into more the sort of pleasure I get from climbing. I went with Lamb with the intention of doing Diamond Cutter or this route (I'd tried the phenomenal No Cruise when I had just moved to Scotland, but before I realised how stupidly fucking steep most mid-extreme trad is up here, and got beaten to a pulp by it). It turned out Diamond Cutter needed a tree cutter to make the start and subsequent belaying more feasible, so Sidewinder it was. And it turned out it was great fun. Very steep, squirmy, committing, but I just felt so good on it, I felt....proper, real. Engaging with a challenge, not so much losing myself in it, but BEING myself in it. Even better when Craig can't jam so couldn't use the rests so got a bit pulped seconding :)

Special Brew Direct E3 5c **, Glen Clova 
Indian Summer for a bit! I was keeping up the low stress, high intensity, easy logistics, hard climbing local inspiration, and although I've never been a big fan of Clova, I was a big fan of enjoying climbing again and just getting on with it. SBD follows a slim black groove so was a nice cauldron to boil my brain for a bit but I got through it okay. Even considering further routes required a long rest in the shade, until the cloud came over and I could try:

Whoremistress E4 6a ***, Glen Clova 
There was a wee concept behind this one. ALL autumn I have been foaming at the dome to get down to Gogarth and get to South Stack and do some fucking awesome fucking routes that fucking inspire the SHIT out of me. But time and distance and partners and then weather have all prevented it and I'm trying not to think about it too much as you can tell from the swearing I'm still fucking gagging for it but it's too short days and likely too cold now. 

In the meantime, Purkle bought me Grant Farquhar's The White Cliff Gogarth coffee table tribute book for my birthday which is an ace present although it didn't really calm down my frustration inspiration! In the absence of being down there, I decided to do one of Grant's local classic routes from when he was a Dundoonian (incidentally as a student a bunch of dossed at his house in Wales for a weekend, although I did fuck all climbing somehow). 

Anyway, Whoremistress was bloody great. Big, exciting, varied, interesting all the way, from the surprisingly technical start to the scary death-peg-"protected" groove teeter, to the penultimate jug-pulling, and the final very reasonable crux and steep crack romp digestif. It was so good and I was so thirsty that I celebrated with a pint of shandy (nectar of the fucking GODs now I'm off soft drinks and almost off booze), and then fish and chips in Kirrie and I slept like a zombie on Night Nurse and that was ace.

Prehistoric Monster E5 6a ***, Earnsheugh 

Okay now it gets serious. Not serious climbing, seriously challenging for me personally. Aberdeen was the place to be this autumn to escape the mixed weather in the west - as I fully and accurately predicted, the resurgence of my motivation coincided exactly (to the day, a brisk before-the-storm day in Camby) with the disappearance of the reliably dry summer. I knew full well that would happen, but I'd take feeling mentally better in shit weather than feeling mentally shit in ace weather. But there was enough aceness in the Deen so that's where I did a fair bit of climbing, including routes that have been on my wishlist for years. And now, despite everything, I felt ready for them?? Well, almost. While Adam was leading up the first intro pitch, I did have to sit for a moment and actually meditate. I'd been encouraged to do this as part of CBT to cope with the emotional response to my illness, and for all the limits and one-dimensionalness of CBT, it seemed sensible then and sensible now. So I held the ropes, shut my eyes, breathed in, breathed out, listened to the sea. I should do this more often - trad climbing is hard enough without the amount of mental clutter I can bring to it.

And then I did the route and it was bloody goey through the crux - hard to work out and fighty above, and the thoroughly awkward rest mostly helped me boil alive in my pointless vest. And Adam managed to recreate the "classic" arseshot from North East Outcrops which still makes me smile.

Necromancer E5 6a ***, Earnsheugh 
I'd abseiled down this 6 times while very carefully looking off to the side to avoid spoiling the experience, and it was almost as much of  a pleasure to abseil down a 7th and 8th time to follow up the E2s, and admire the route with relaxation and reminiscence. World class climbing with no holds to spare and a lot of go for it required. Estimating the correct crux cam placement was one of the best climbing decisions I've made! 

Doing both of these routes was hard. I was on good form, I did well, but fuck me....it felt like properly pushing it again. I didn't need to go any further than that....

Bob's Overhang E4 6a ***, Long Slough 
Fourth visit over the years to get this one I think? Visit 1 it was too intimidating, visit 2 it was a bit greasy and I downclimbed from the flake, PJ was more enthusiastic and went for it and missed the pocket. Visit 3 it was slimier than a squid's snatch. Visit 4 was finally good. Even so I had to do the obligatory downclimb just to get fully warmed up. All those years involved trying hard to train my mind to go for it above gear and that seemed to pay off - I was pretty pleased to guess the correct sequence first go out of the sea of white herrings and it was over pretty quick.

Polka Dot E3 5c **, Long Slough
This was over less quick as the smooth, slick, RP protected start crux took yet more up and downing to get accustomed to it. Long Slough Red Rocks is notoriously hard to find in condition so it was worth taking advantage of it and this turned out to be a really cool little route too with a nice steady bulge.

Piltdown Connection E3 5c **, Red Tower 

Pure pleasure, once I'd figured out which actual way to go at the crux instead of trying a slappy 6a direct past shallow RPs. Definitely the best use of this fine sheet of granite, with the positions of Neanderthal Man but less wandering, more technical, cleaner rock, etc. Lovely. I tried Waltzinblack again after this and escaped off again. Too many very slick granite slopers above shallow gear - I wanted some nice crystal crimps.

Desert Rendezvous E3/4 5c **, Spittal 
Wow this was a find. Northumberland's best sea-cliff, Pex-Upon-Tweed, developed by raiding Scots 30 years ago and lying hidden and undocumented until recently. I spotted the topo on the County Psyche farcebook page, shared it on my own page, tagged the McNair as the grade range would suit him, met Smally at Ratho and Niall had invited him and there we were, climbing middling (me) to hard (them) trad on beautiful but intimidatingly sheer wall of quarried pocketed sandstone in the most lovely location set above the sea. It all felt quite dreamlike given how the crag had just come to light, and was an ace day out. Although I didn't manage to try the 3rd and hardest E4 as it got too late as Smally had spent about an hour shaking out on a tiny pocket mid-crux on a sandbag E5 6b, grumbling about sandy holds and long reaches before eventually doing it ;).

Softly Treads The Beetle E4 6a ***, Spittal 


Desert Rendezvous was a new route by Steve Blake, Softly Treads was an old route by the original pioneers. Both were great. DR as a bit bolder with spaced gear but better shakeouts. ST had more regular pro (including obligatory twin tricams) but more continuous climbing.

Fast Reactor E3 6a **, Meackie Point 

It felt very weird going to the Deen so much and not hooking up with my previously regular partner in crime PJ, but he has been somewhat hampered by having an admittedly lovely daughter (who, in the words of his wife, "she has brought her A-game to being parented"). At last time and indeed tide coincided and we got a couple of days out - Cambus O May quarry to get shut down by chipped holds and morpho lanks, and Meackie Point to admire seals and do this committing wee route I'd backed off years ago. And finished with...

Kenyan Cowboy E2 5c **, Tangerine Point 
Which is PJ's own route and worth an upgrade to E2 as well as two solid stars. Although short it's a classic corner weaving through roofs, micro-space-walking at a reasonable grade despite the angle. Really very nice :)


First ascents:


And I finished off the decent autumn weather with something a bit different. A month before, abbing off a singular sapling above Sidewinder, I noticed there were a few gaps between the main lines at Lednock's High Wall. Hmmm. This seemed strange. 1 hour from Central Belt cities, south facing, 5 minute walk-in, and still new routes to be climbed?? Don't look a gift horse in the mouth, Fiend. A hurried afternoon inspecting and cleaning (and clearing the Diamond Cutter tree and nearby thorns) and a frantic week drumming up moral support for what was going to be the last good weather day for a while. Connor and Purkle were up for the task and after belaying the former on some of the lower routes, and furthering the cats cradle of abseil sapling back-ups, I managed to get two newies done. Which was, indeed, nice.

Indoor Storm E4/5 6a/b **, Glen Lednock
Named after a proper banger of an album by DJ Pish Posh which I was listening to on my visit to clean and inspect. This route has a cool compression crux at the top above bomber gear in the break. It's really quite neat. As well as abseil inspection I had a quick top-rope play on the crux - unknown, undocumented territory and all that. Fortuitous as it didn't go by my expected sequence but by hidden slopers instead. Hard to grade but compared to a vaguely similar Bob's Overhang (hard pulls above gear), it's maybe similarly difficult but much harder to read, 6a if you're lucky but 6b otherwise. Maybe.


Echo Box E3/4 5c/6a *, Glen Lednock 
Named after pretty funky DJ Brockie track, to continue the theme. A bit more minor but still a decent wee route and far more logical and appealing than the established but wandering "Perishing" that it neatly bisects. Another tricky one to grade as again the holds and gear are blind. 



It was a pretty lush evening too...

So that's me all caught up. Now it's grit I think....

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