Recently I've had some setbacks with my amateur chossaneering. I seem to have come up with an abrupt wall where the gentle terrain of "Big G grading routes quite softly in his later climbing years" suddenly rears up into daunting scenarios of "Big G grading routes in direct comparison to his multiple Gogarth E7 6b roof crack heyday", and unlike the rock in reality, this particular wall doesn't seem soft or wobbly enough to pull a few bits off and sneak around it. Thus I'm running out of routes I can pretend my way up by climbing very slowly and gently and ignoring the dubious structural integrity, and starting to be faced with things that are actually hard. And then there are other issues with off-piste routes that don't get nearly the repeats they deserve:
The latest shambles looked a bit like this:
Dichotomous, The Range - superb bit of rock in a superb situation. The first two superfluous pegs I pulled out by hand. The essential gear protecting the crux along an expanding undercling finger flake with lichenous smearing consisted of the one remaining bendy peg with rust flaking off it and a missing RURP. The long fall from here would leave on having to be lowered into the sea. I bailed.
The Blue Horse, Porth Dafrach - Warming up on Caff's minor sandbag DAME was fun. Feeling the greasy flakiness at the start of The Blue Horse and trying to envisage the brutal laybacking required for upwards/outwards progress along with protecting the whole sheningan was less fun. I bailed.
Angel Of The West, The Range - On paper this is a mere half a grade harder than Surreal Estate that had been a perfectly charming womble the previous day. In reality it must be a good 3 grades harder. I have looked at AOTW from many angles on 4 visits, and have been doing specific training for it on The Depot roof and The Boardroom DWS roof, and it still looks utterly and incomprehensibly outrageous. I bailed (but I'm still thinking about the fucking thing).
Three Day Event, Porthllechog - more like Three Metre Event as that's about how high I got up it. Somewhat more conventional in angle and situation than the other routes but, well, my guts had been bad that morning (for absolutely no fucking reason), the refreshing breeze all day had dropped in time for my attempt, there seemed to be plant life covering crucial holds, I'm a wimp, etc etc. I bailed.
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Anyway, all of this got me thinking, thinking about some proper choss, proper potentially wonderful routes, and the Top Three That Got Away, which goes a bit like this....
Wow. Okay. This one. Honestly, if I'd got up this (a one star route at a grade I've done dozens of), it could have been the route of my life. Rainbow Zawn looks quite impressive from the side....but from below, it's unbelievable. It was genuinely hard to take in how impressive and intimidating it looked - constantly overhanging end-on strata of culm sandstone and shale. I battled for an hour up the first pitch to find that a section through an overhang (shared with an E3 5b!!) was missing and I couldn't work out how to climb it. I left a wire and krab in-situ and this update for UKHitlering (which never made it on afaik)
"An epic climb that is one of the easiest (!) lines up a shocking cliff. Originally graded E4, the first pitch has lost holds including at least one crucial ledge, and it is a very different experience to South Stack / Lleyn / Craig Llong E4s. The end-on shale strata are ungenerous with holds so expect an awesome adventure with hard, strenuous climbing as well as the obligatory loose rock, rope-cutting edges, rusty pegs and sandy cracks."
I still regret not doing it.
Immortalised on film with me backing off it, tail firmly between stockings. A very cinemogenic King Line chosen for Cheque's Seaside, as a light digestif to accompanying Duncan on Eroica (and the bugger calmly encouraging me onto Black Magic despite my qualms). Alas it wasn't meant to be, the choss quotient was perfectly fine (in it's own shaley way) but the much-harder-than-graded climbing with much-smaller-than-required gear was a bit too much. A pity as it really did look ace.
A recent inspiration and retreat. A great bit of rock in a lovely wee zawn, but this time whilst both the climbing and gear on the first pitch seemed manageable, the choss was in full effect with almost everything feeling crunchy, or wobbly, or indeed both. Yes, I backed off the first 5a pitch, but abbing down (with the lone belay stake reassuringly backed up by the dog stake), the two 5b pitches looked just as hard and terrifying as they did from the slope opposite. I suppose when someone (Littlejohn) who has been E6 new-routing for decades, including the Lleyn, warns that "some of the rock requires a light touch", I should probably be extra wary despite the lowly grade. So the right decision, but still disappointing.
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Back to the present day. It feels a bit weird to run out of inspiration at The Range. I do love it there. So gentle and peaceful and beautiful and weird and sketchy on the routes. But there's odds and sods to pop in for, and other coastal gems to explore and the bird bans are off South Stack this weekend... I just need to get some fucking confidence back as it's taken a bit of a beating with these retreats, my digestion being up and down, my sport fitness going to pot (too much amateur chossaneering, sigh), etc etc. Fingers crossed.
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