Lime Time

So, I come out of lockdown, woefully unfit and weak, in desperate need of training, and the bloody climbing walls are closed. So what's the next best option?? Well, UK inland limestone is only marginally worse than climbing indoors, and desperate times call for desperate measures... I've sat on bolts, I've sat on pads, I've sat on my wee camping stool and very occasionally I've sat on top of a crag or at the chains of a sport route, all in the company of the usual polished knobbly blotchy choss or tottering dusty quarried choss. Still the dales are lovely once you're not battling through nettles to reach vertical turf sandbag trad that hasn't been climbed since the 80s and the quarries are tolerable if you ignore the surroundings and just focus on the lone 10% of vaguely aesthetic rock in front of your face. So in celebration of this, and in no order whatsoever, here's a Top Ten of the least worst limestone I've done recently:

Lady Of Satan, Avon Gorge
In complete contrast to the rest of the list, this off-piste gem on Avon Gorges' Leigh Wood's Quarry 5's Red Wall was straight out of Gogarth's Red Wall, and thus automatically excellent. An inland adventure featuring ledge-shuffling at it's finest - easy, unnerving, and life-affirming. This brought a grin to my face and definitely cleared some of the sterile bolt-clipping cobwebs away.

Supercalorific, Torbay
I didn't think that a snatched day out burning off the long drive aches and stiffness on an "in-law" visit to Sidmouth would involve doing the best F6a+ in the UK, but there we go. An immaculate sheet of flowstone with constant technicalites and variety.

Paranoid Eyes, Low Stony Bank
Just slightly easier than the "2 grades easier" battle of Visionhurry to the left, this was the most enjoyable pitch during a long and long overdue mileage day at the Stony Banks. A lovely location in a discreet river valley above Gordale, and one of the many recent throbbing hotspots of relentless unconsulted blanket retro-bolting of Yorkshire trad routes. Still, some of the older (retroed?) lines are pretty nice especially this triple-crux line that was never desperate but always interesting.

Short Problem, Blackwell Dale
Recced after an unproductive visit to the "Cucket Delf for the 7C" climber shit-pit that is Lee's Bottom, which mostly involved discovering that 7C climbers can't grade """6C""" problems for shit. SP seemed a much more feasible proposition, so the only option was to come back fresher, and of course in the pissing rain, which often makes lime grot more satisfying. A cool, distinctive problem for easier lime, given it has an obvious start and finish and independent climbing.

The Pinch, Pleasley Vale
Another "conditions snatching" trip at a fresh and bone dry Pleasley whilst it was honking down across The Peaks. Did a bit of trad which mostly involved soloing highball boulder problems then fiddling in a couple of small cams for "scrambling remains" finish, then got involved with this semi-classic reachy burlfest and somehow managed to get it after a proper fight.

Coming Up For Air, Moat Buttress
At it's correct grade of F7b+ of course - slightly easier than Garderobe which I also did and is objectively better, but CUFA felt more enjoyable to me as it was my first redpoint of the season. I'd lowered down Moat People after flashing Moat Afloat, but the flakes and gastons of CUFA kept catching my eye so I gave it a go, found the moves suited me, and got quite excited. The highlight was actually my first redpoint attempt, getting to the final teetery rockover, being a bit unsettled, and blowing it - taking a good fall and realising how close I was, were both as satisfying as when I actually did it.

Helicon, Stoney Middleton
Slowly easing back into trad although this one isn't that easy! A super-direct line apart from the gorse cornice shuffle at the top, with 3 cruxes and plenty of interest, well worth the wee scramble to get there. I'm hoping to gradually work my way through more Stoney trad as a useful mileage location.

The Calcspa, Slaley Brook
A typical oasis of calm rock in a maelstorm of swirling rubble - really surprisingly pleasant. This I think is the line of the craglet, genuinely pleasant and amenable climbing up strong calcite flowstone features.

Aperta, Hidden Quarry
The first of two nu-school classics opposite the old-skool sport misery that is Horseshoe. I had a great day getting back into things here with ron-hill-dark-horse mark20, and this route with it's two distinct cruxes, one delicate and the other reachy and cranky, was the highlight.

This Is Not A Drill, Dalton Quarry
And the second nu-school quarried classic, this time the sheet of rock is even more elegant on it's own and the surroundings of tottering rubble are even more disturbing. But on this route after a very cranky, committing crux you can motor to a tiny rest niche and turn around and just stand there and admire the sun-blasted view of desolation whilst relaxing for a gently burly finish. My favourite rest ledge so far....

In summary:

Stony Bank. Idyllic.

Short Problem. Less idyllic, but fun.